Dear Bright Star and St. James Church Family,

I greet you today with the joy of the Lord, which truly is our strength. As your pastor, I feel both the responsibility and the privilege to speak truth in love, especially when it concerns the sacred covenant of relationships and marriage. We are living in a time where the world offers quick fixes and fantasy solutions, but at Bright Star & St. James, we believe in doing relationships and marriage the Bible way. That means: God created it, but we must commit to cultivating and strengthening it. Over the past few months, so many have asked, "PCH, can you please pray for my relationship or marriage?" I feel led to do more than pray, and that is why you are receiving this email with resources to assist. But YOU have to do the work because "faith without works is dead." Read James 2:14-26 (Message Bible).

Relationships & Marriage Require Investment

You see, relationships and marriage require investment. You cannot make withdrawals out of accounts where there has been no deposits. Whether you're dating with purpose, engaged, newly married, or decades in, successful relationships are never accidental. They require INTENTIONAL investment, consistent communication, mutual understanding, and unwavering commitment.

The Word of God reminds us: “Through wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established; by knowledge the rooms are filled with all precious and pleasant riches.” Proverbs 24:3-4 (NKJV). Marriage and relationship doesn't work because we hope it does. It works because we work on it together. The truth is, many couples, don’t know who they are, let alone truly understand who they’re doing life with. That’s why tools and resources are so critical in today’s relational climate.

Recommended Resources from XO Marriage

I want to strongly encourage every couple in our church to invest in the transformational books, study guides, and resources from

XO Marriage (Click the Link or go to https://store.xomarriage.com/collections/books)

These are not just tools, they are lifelines designed to spark essential conversations and bring clarity, healing, and depth to your relationship. One of my personal favorites is: Marriage on the Rock (25th Anniversary Edition) by Jimmy Evans. This book is rich in biblical principles and filled with wisdom that will challenge and bless you. Here are three powerful takeaways:

1. God Is the Foundation of Every Great Marriage – If Christ is not the center, cracks will show. The book teaches how to keep God as your cornerstone.

2. You Must Prioritize Your Spouse Above All Others (Even Kids!) – Your marriage cannot thrive if your spouse feels second to your job, your children, or your phone.

3. Real Communication = Intimacy – You can’t build a future with someone you refuse to open up to. Silence breeds separation.

In addition to the book, the accompanying Study Guide is a phenomenal tool. It provides practical questions and guided reflections that help couples uncover blind spots, explore their emotional needs, and build strong spiritual and emotional bonds. And here’s something even better: Head over to YouTube and watch the Marriage on the Rock videos by Jimmy Evans. These sessions complement the book beautifully and will bring the lessons to life. Make it a weekly habit to sit down with your spouse and watch, read, reflect, and pray together. “Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor.” Ecclesiastes 4:9 (NKJV)

We Believe in God’s Way

At our congregations, we’re not just pro-marriage, we are pro-covenant. We believe in God’s blueprint for love, relationships, and family. But while God does the creating, we must do the cultivating. Let’s do the work. Let’s have the conversations. Let’s lean into the grace of God and the wisdom of proven resources to build marriages that last a lifetime. This is not just about being married, this is about being healthily, happily, and Holy married.

Hope this helps. Do this together. This SUNDAY, July 20th, during our altar prayer, we will pray for all relationships and marriages. Bring your spouse, Boo or Bae (lol) to go before the Lord on behalf of your relationship. See you and your family Sunday at 10AM at Kenwood High School located 5015 S. Blackstone Ave. (park and enter Door 6 on Lake Park Avenue.) Feel free to invite other couples to join you this Sunday at church. I want to bless and pray for them too!

“Doing What I Can; While I Can; With What I Have; Within HIS Will."